Monday, October 12

Day 12 - A Giant Step Forward

Hey there lovelies.

Wont write much today, don't have much pics!
I'm struggling, a lot. But nothing to worry about, because I'm definitely not restricting!!
I took a giant leap of faith and talked to my best friend about my ED....! And it was so good!
To just let it all get out for once!!! And I did take it even further, I made an appointment with a specialist! AAAH!!! I'm so nervous!!! I can't even believe what I did!!! My head always tells me "You're not even thin, you can't have an ED, you don't deserve treatment!!!" And this sucks so much!!!
Everything is starting to get out of controll again and I'm sure this was inevitable!! But I'm so damn scared!!! My appointment is on the 29th, wish me luck!! Again I'm starting to doubt if this was the right thing to do!!! I'm going crazy here!!!

I've only got a few pics - nothing special, here we go:

breakfast - as usual

lunch - leftovers: brussel sprouts, veggies, falafel and some quinoa and butternutsquash

dinner: big salad, soup with ww bread, three slices ww bread with guacamole and turkey

Everything yum of course - but had once again more but didn't take a pic! I've got a new obsession - as if this would be a surprise ;) - pistachios!!! :D

Have a great day everyone!! And sorry for the debby-downer post!!!


  1. Good luck with the pending appointment. It was the right thing to do; just be completely honest and let it all out. I love your dinner!!! Where did you get that glass salad bowl? The past 2 months I have been searching for a HUGE dish of some sort for my dinners. I have a 4qt Pyrex, and everything I find is either plastic, or ceramic. I have been collecting gigantic salad bowls for the past 6 years. No jokes.

    Hope you gain inner strength, and peace!
    Have a lovely day!

  2. congrats on setting the appointment - that's the hardest thing! I hope everything goes well - just take it one day at a time.

  3. good luck with your appointment lovie! and about not feeling like you deserve help because ed tells you lies about the way you look...EVERY girl/women with an ED nomatter what siz deserves help, a size doesn't define how "sick" you are....the fact taht you are getting help, and reaching out to make life better is amazing! i am so proud of you AND you deserve the world and all the treatment just as much as any other girl!

    one day at a time lovie


  4. Hey hun! AHH your eats look so so SO good!!! My mouth is watering right now! : D

    I'm so glad youve made an appointment with a specialist! Those are the EXACT same thoughts I had that led me to not made an appointment back at the beginning of recovery. And yay for sharing with your bff. We all need that real life support system : )

    Take care dear, and much love,

  5. hey lovie, :)
    good luck at the appointment, as Maya said everyone deserves help and dont let your ED tell you other wise, size weight etc has nothing to do with the level of care one deserves, you are so special and you deserve to get is the right thing to do, and don't doubt your choice to go to the appt.
    lovely eats, so nourishing and colorful!

    xx love you nic