Thx Everyone!!

Thank you for coming here!! :)

But I have to admit that I no longer blog...!

Although I always loved blogging and I always will,

I'm just not that confident to continue!!

Feeling awkward about the language, thinking I don't have anything interesting

to blog about... And just being insecure about a lot of things in general was

enough for me to just stop!

I love to read ALL about ALL of you and will probably never stop! :D

And I try to be better in commenting! Because I want you to know how much I care!!

I'll keep this journal up and running, might it just be for me to look back..

How far I've come, how much mistakes I made and even just to reflect!

Thank you all for participating in my journey!!

I still have a long way to go!

But knowing that I'm not alone is the most important thing for me!

I truly appreciate each comment you all left and every word you read!

Keep up the good work! I feel so inspired by all of you!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!!

Lots of love and everything you might need...!

Nicole

SoSP 2 - Road Trip

Well hello there everyone!!!

So glad you enjoyed my last post!

I really try to post at least once a week!

I enjoy it so much! But there is always some kind of barrier inside of me!

The more I'll post, the more certain I'll become (once again) with my writing!

And you all help me so much with all your lovely comments!

As always THANK YOU!!

Here we go... Today I'd like to tell you a story... Kidding!

A few weeks ago I got on a little road trip to visit my soon-to-be tattoo artist!

Sadly she works 250 miles from here! But no reason for me to not choose her!

I believe she is perfect for the vision I have for my newest tattoo!

(Oh right there is a new idea for an upcomming post...)

Anyone interested in a post about my tattoos?!

I digress..

What I really want to tell you is what I brought with me!

Of course I prepared a few things so I could eat on the way to save time!

Little did I know that I would have plenty of time to eat because of poor traffic!

I got stuck on the highway for TWO hours!!! :(

So the day before I prepared a famous Breakfast-Cookie for the first time!

the evening before with vega chocolate protein powder - thus the ugly color!

the next morning - all prettied up! :D

with mango and coconut flakes - yum!

Great on-the-go breakfast!

Further I pre-cut lots of veggies and fruit for snacking (and lunch/dinner whatever was needed):

cherry tomatoes, cauliflower, carrots, zucchini, kohlrabi and mango

of course not to forget - lots of ketchup with mustard for dipping

everything (plus two pears) all packed up and ready to go

It was the first beautiful day in a long time! I surely enjoyed it but the two hours of traffic could have been spent better!

happy to be on the way - with beautiful weather (and before the bad traffic!)

I arrived save and sound at my destination, only eating about half of my snacks!

As I stayed there in a hotel for one night - and found some awesome sushi for dinner - I saved the rest for the drive home!

Everything was great for snacking / eating while driving!!

The zucchini was the only thing that was awful the next day!

Totally bitter and blech! Had to toss it, but there wasn't a lot left!

I will definitely make this again!

So... On the side again:

Work: Still lots to do, still enjoying it!

Dance: Feeling pretty good and secure in my dancing for the Performances on Saturday and Sunday! Hope everything will go fine!

Body: Everything is still aching!!! Not a big deal during the day BUT I can't sleep... And that's really annoying!! No more than an hour before I wake up with pain in my shoulders!! So that's really agonizing! Hope with all the anti-inflammation meds I got this will vanish soon!!

Mood: Generally still good... Really tired thus a little snippy! But again... Hopefully this will change soon! And I'm really excited for this upcoming Performance so this keeps me sane! :D

Thanks for reading! ;)

And have a good day everyone!!

It's lunch-time here so I have to go prepare my lunch!

Bye....

Edit to add: Sorry!! I have no idea why this looks so wacky! Couldn't fix it!! :((

Starting a 'Series of Short Posts' (SoSP)

Hey there everyone!

I decided to give my motiavtion to post a little boost and start 'small' again! ;)

This means I hopefully will post more often but just small posts, inspired by a certain topic!

To start I'm going with GREEN MONSTERS!!

Or better PURPLE and GREEN Monsters!

1/2 a banana, frozen cherries, milk (and a side of favorite series)

1/2 a frozen banana, lots of spinach, milk (and a side of hot bath)

1/2 a frozen banana, lots of spinach, milk + peanut butter (and a side of growing basil & chives)

1/2 a frozen banana, lots of spinach, milk + peanut butter (with a side of mango and strawberries)

As you can see, I finally jumped on the GM-wagon!!

It quickly became a staple post-dance fuel! And I'm loving it!

On other topics:

Work: Finally tons of work again!! After a long period of doing not so much at work, I really enjoy having tons to do!! My days are filled with fun things to do and I missed this so much!!

Dance: Generally doing fine, but...

Body: My whole body is aching!!! I clearly am on my last leg! :S But our Performance is nearing quickly and I can't just stop! But have to tone it down a little! I know that after this there will be lots and lots of R&R!! Can't wait!

Mood: Generally good... But all this constant muscel ache is slowly but surely getting on my nerves!

So this is it, for today!!

Come back soon for a new part of SoSP! :D

Hope you'll enjoy my short but hopefully cute posts!

Oh and THANK YOU ALL so much for the kind words on my last post!!

Have a good one...! ;)

Nic

Missed.....

You guys....

I missed my own Blog Anniversary!!!!

EDIT to add: It was on april the 14th!

:(

Can't believe it!!!

Can't believe I've been blogging for a year!!

OK not quite that often and with more than one break,

but a year nonetheless!!

More than a year ago I discovered the beautiful thing that is called blogging!

Especially ALL YOUR GREAT BLOGS!!!

And I'm so glad!!

You all have no idea how much you made my life!!!

I would never be at the place I am right know!!

Not without all of you!!

So appreciative to know you all!!

I've made quite a few really awesome friends!!!

THANK YOU!!!

And I promise that the next time I blog,

there will be pictures!!!

Promise!!!

But right now I'm just laying here in my bed,

not able to sleep yet....

Reminiscing of all that I

did, read, saw, discovered, learned, lost

but most importantly gained!!

All of you guys, lots of knowledge and....

a little bit of the self worth I lost a long time ago!

Thank you for all the opportunities to learn, love and litsten!!

Love you all!!! And I definitely learned to love more of myself this past year!!

Thank you!!! Can't say that enough!!

Back --- Finally

Whewww... That was an unexpected long break!!!

I'm so sorry for that!!

It wasn't planed but - to be quite honest - it was relieving and I totally needed it!!

Nonetheless I'm so glad to be back!!

Hope you are too?! ;)

Well how are you?! How have you been?!

Where do I start?!

Actually I'd like to mention Rebecca here first! Because she is the reason I do this post!

Or at least she was the last push I needed to finally find the courage to write again!

I need to say here that I am really intimidated by all your fabulous writing!!

I wish I would be able to articulate myself like you do!

But I know that it isn't important how many words I use or if they are fancy or not! The important thing is that I really enjoy interacting with you all and I really care for all of you. At the same time this is the reason why it takes so long for me to do a post! I overthink and overanalyse everything, every word, every sentence!!

I just NEED to STOP this!! And I think I'm on the right way!

Alright... Where have I been?! What was I doing?! You might ask yourself.

The answer is: Nothing!

Ok that's not quite the truth, of course I've been doing lots and have been here and there! But it really doesn't feel like i did! It's like I didn't LIVE in the first few month of this year and just existed!

And I'm just about to finally wake up and get going again! I'm eager to move on!! And ready for it!

It was an exhausting time even though I didn't do much (aside from my dancing and eating way to much!!) and mentally draining! I was in a bad place!! Constantly doubting myself and 'feeling fat'! I know... FAT isn't a feeling but I was so consumed by my body (how it felt, looked and how my clothes fit)!!

I of course restricted (or better tried to) and therefore binged not long after!!

What a vicious cycle I know way too well.

But I got out!! I pulled through!!

I'm steadily loosing again (and for those of you who don't know, I'm NOT and nowhere near underweight so that's a good thing!!) and am happy with my life at the moment!!

I'm happy with my dancing, (I finally got rid of the pain in my calf!! It seems to be healed aside from some soreness now and then) I'm making progress!

Finally being able to do pointe again!!! Looking forward to the play we are having in June - of course I'm nervous and afraid of failure but right now the excitement and eagerness to become better overtake the negative feelings!!

Jazz is making a lot more sense to me and I start to really enjoy movements I really loathed for a long time!!

What else?! Oh right... On the 'food-front' I did a lot of experimenting!

Of course AFTER I pulled myself out of the rut I was in the first few month of 2010!

Lot's of veggie-lunches, salads and almond butter-yogurts there!

I finally dried a Green Monster!! WOW!! Why did I wait so long?! (Maybe because we don't have as much fresh spinach here in Switzerland in winter?! And now there is lots of spinache everywhere!! Even organic one!! YAY!!)

I had one every day the first week I tried it!!! And now it's my to-go recovery meal for dance nights (Monday, Wednesday and Thursday I have ballet and/or jazz) and I AM IN LOVE!!! So much variation!

Furthermore I am acually experimenting with new meals!!

It really helped that the temperatures dropped again (even though I really enjoyed the nice weather and low 70s) and it's rainy and cold here! That way I fancy warm meals! And I discover my passion for comming up with new creations! So glad!! What a joy to just try!!

Oh and I finally (lots of finally's in this post!! Sorry!) made homemade Larabars - NicBars! ;D

Soooo good!!

The first time I did them I overwhelmed myself because I couldn't settle for just two or three flavors

- I had to do FIFE (cashew cookie, pistachio, coconut, lime, tropical)!!!

Now I'm down to my TREE favorites (tropical, coconut and coconut&cacao),

which I'm doing over and over again! Such a great pre-workout snack!!

And here we are!!!

Lots of words (and no pics, sorry!!) later, I'm still living! JK ;)

I am so glad I took the step and did this post!! I actually planned on doing just a draft and then come back later to add stuff but I just couldn't stop writing!! And even though I don't have any pictures here (my camera is at home and I didn't to lots of photografing the last few month!) I am going to push that PUBLISH button right know!!

I'll be back!! With pictures of the NicBars and GreenMonsters!! Promise!!

I hope I still have some readers!!

And my apologizes again for being AWOL for so long!! But I just needed the break apparently!

Thanks for reading!! And thanks for all the comments I got through Facebook and such!!

You all are just amazing!!

Have a wonderful day/night whathever it is where you are!!

Lots and lots of love!!

MIA again..... sorry!

hey there all you loveable ones!!!

just wanna let you know, that even if i'm not posting at the moment,

i'm reading all your blogs!!

sorry for not commenting lately.... will pick that up again, promise!!

hope you all had a wonderful start into the new year!!

i was sick.... once again!!

and everything is a little out of the ordinary lately here!!

i'm keeping my head out of the water and try to think positive!

sorry again... for letting you hanging there!!

oh by the way,

dublin was awesome!!

enjoyed the loneliness,

ate too much (but nothing new!)

and felt right at home there!!

will be back soon....

love you all....

sounds tacky but it's so true!

you all give me soooo much with all your blogs

you just have no idea!!

thank you....

and keep on doing great like you all do!!

You All Are The Best

To all of you beautiful, wonderful and caring readers!!

I wish you the best holidays!!

A very merry christmas with lots of love and warmth!!

And an even better new year!!

You all did so good last year, of course there were hiccups, but you're all here now!!

Keep the strenght, the determination and you all will succeed!!

Once again I want to thank you!!

For all the comments here and on facebook!!

I honestly don't know where and how I would be without all of you!!

I TRULY LOVE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!!

Always remember that everything will be good,

as long as we give our best!!

Lots of love and happiness for all of you!!

ps: my mom is better, i am better, everything will be alright...!

i am going to spend a few days in dublin (27th to 30th) ALONE to sort some things out for myself!

i will be posting more frequent in the new year!! promise!